Sunday, 13 December 2009

Growing up

It's been almost 2 months since I last blogged. And almost 2 months since my aunt's passing. The honest truth is that I am still grieving..Once in awhile it hits me that she's really gone, and I still struggle at times to convince myself that she IS gone. That I can't just drive over to her place and talk to her anymore. Tonight I went over to her house to visit my other aunt and my uncle, and no matter how well I can cover up the sadness when I'm around others, I can never get over the emptiness I feel when I go over there. The whole place reminds me of her. The hall, the chairs, the kitchen, her room, even the toilet! I can't share this sadness with anyone but my small aunt. We depend on each other for comfort, and pull each other up with our conversations.

Life has been going on quite smoothly, I went to Malacca for a weekend a few weeks back - been hoping for this trip since I watched the Little Nyonya drama when I was back in UK..haha. Got my new car last Saturday =) Its a Midnight Blue it.

Somehow I feel like I have grown so much during the past few months, since I've been back in Malaysia. Maybe its work, probably is. I've experienced some new things, met new people, and am starting to see the world in a different light. It sounds so simple, the last sentence I just typed. But there is so much to it. I was once told that as you grow older, the black's and white's of life slowly blend together and you'll see the world as gray. It's not that I didn't believe what the person told me, but I was just waiting till the day I started seeing the black's and white's blend together. And now I have. Not everything is as simple and uncomplicated as I first saw it. In fact NOTHING is that simple. One of the biggest lessons I have learnt recently is not to take 1st impressions too seriously.
Not to focus too much on the surface, dig deeper, and take your time making your choice as to what you should think about someone, something, or a situation.

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