Saturday, 3 October 2009

what you need is not what you want

Most of the time in our lives, what you want, is not what you need. This we have been told many times since we were young and there always seemed to be stuff that we wanted, i.e. sweets, chocolates, toys, video games, and the list goes on and on, and then upgrades to handphones, laptops, bla bla bla later on in life.

But sometimes, we come to a point in life where things that we decide on, don't just affect ourselves. This is when the situation is reversed for the first time, and what you need is not what you want. And suddenly you are stuck, not knowing what to do now, because you are faced with a decision which affects so many aspects in your life, but you know you have to do it.

Never have I been faced with such a big decision to make, one with such great impact. I have no one to help me make this decision. And now I feel like I have no one to depend on again. Again, I am feeling how I felt when I first started this blog. I thought that I could depend on you, but inside...I know that its not going to work out that way. Somehow, I know that we won't have that happy ending that I hoped for.

Sometimes the one we love is also not the one we should be with. But would you rather be with someone who you love and ignore your own principles, or would you stick to your principles which are guaranteed to be right and let go of the one you love?

I need to make a huge decision soon. But with that decision, there also comes another decision which has been there for an unbelievably long time, but which I have chosen to ignore so far. And now everyday, every waking minute, these 2 subjects are on my mind..begging me to take the step..shadowing my mind...making the world look different all of a sudden. Everything looks gray now....Unless I make these 2 decisions. But if I make the decisions, is there a guarantee that the colours in my world will return? What if it remains gray... or it just loses all its meaning...

What I need to do right now is not what I want to do....

Just to share a song that I am listening to at the moment:

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