Thursday 1 January 2015

Wait.

2014 was such a great year for me. I grew so so so much as a Christian, and all the things I learned have transformed my entire life. We are called to be Christ-like, and I always felt it was much easier said than done, which it is, but when we pray with sincere hearts for God to guide us to be more Christ-like, there will never be a reason for Him not to.

I know, 2015 is going to be even more exciting. It's not just me hoping it; I know it. I'm excited, I'm very very excited!

There are some things which I really want God to guide me in:

1) To see myself the way He sees me. This year He revealed to me that I had deep scars within me which caused me to feel unworthy of love - sometimes even unworthy of my own love. And this in effect caused me and is still causing me to always be afraid of being judged by others. I don't always speak or act the way I really am.

2) For patience in waiting for His provision. Many, many, many people have been telling me that they have been praying for me. Even those who do not know Christ have been wishing me luck. Most of the time, I'm alright. I believe His promises to provide. But sometimes, especially during festive seasons, it's difficult. It is so difficult being alone. And I always thank the people who have been praying for me, then just laugh it off. But I want to tell them that "I really can't wait to meet him too!!". I might look cool calm collected but when I get home, I cry and I wonder and I pray for patience.

I'm glad that my final night of 2014 was spent with my church friends, honoring Him and singing praises to Him. There is nothing else I would rather have done than that.

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