The Devil at Four O'Clock

Last night, I stayed up to watch a movie called The Devil at Four O'Clock from 1961. It was a really good movie, and I've always loved classic movies. It was the first time in my life that I stayed up late watching a movie with my daddy and I just felt really happy...

The movie was about a priest on an island near Hawaii. He took care of children with leprosy in a hospital which he built for them with his own hands because the villagers wouldn't accept them in society. When a volcano near the hospital erupted and he was in town, he insisted on going up to the hospital to save them, eventhough everyone said that the whole island would be covered in lava if he didn't escape immediately. It really touched me and made me miss the children in Bali so much, because I know that if I were in that situation, I really couldn't just leave the children behind either..

Today, I was told my work is appreciated. That's all I asked for..thank you for telling me.

Success to me is..

Everyone has their own definition of what the word 'successful' means. To me, right now, being successful is about being able to balance both my emotions and physical energy between serving God, my family, my 2nd family in Bali, and work.

Work is increasingly challenging, but I want to try to leave all the stress behind once I step out of the office and be able to not talk about work with friends and family. I want to be able to laugh at jokes without having worries at the back of my mind. I love it when I can sit with my little brother and play computer games without being distracted. I want to be able to decide the days I can leave work early and go for a jog in the park next to my house. I am proud of the fact that I can earn my own money to pay for my own car loan, my rent, my food, give money to my grandma, and save up for visits to Bali. I love how I can be independant enough to drive down to Seremban alone to spend weekends with grandma.

I want to be able to show my boss this - that I might not have finished the work you asked me to do this morning, I might not know what you're talking about at the moment, but I want you to know that I'm trying. I'm trying my very best to catch up with you, so please bear with me.  I want to be able to give my all to work when I'm at work; and give my all to the more important things in life when I'm out of the office.

This is the point of discovery in my life. I am discovering who I am, but at the same time I am in full control of the wheel to decide who I want to be. I want to be good at work. But I work to live, and not the other way around.

This is who I am and these are what I want in my life at the moment. What about you?

Online in Old Town White Coffee update

I got some very good news yesterday..but I know I'm still not ready.
I love how time is such a relative thing. It can seem like it flies by when you're happy, and how it drags on and on when you aren't. And I love how everything sometimes flows so perfectly according to time if we remain patient.

On another note, I've been learning so much at work! I remember how at cell group on Friday night last week, we were asked to describe our past week in ONE word. My word was "responsibilities", because I was really getting more work and had to bear the responsibilities of solving some problems that the contractors were facing at the construction site. Then we were asked to describe the kind of week we would want to have the following week in one word, and my word was "control" because I had loads of work in the office and still had to go to the site to supervise our pre-fire inspection testing. I really hoped that I would be able to have control over the situation, and though I had to tell off one of the contractors for not completing their job, it turned out very well and work at the office was under control too.

So it has been a really exhausting week but I'm happy :)

I logged onto AirAsia to check ticket prices! Hope they don't go up too much when I get my pay next week. I really can't wait to see my babies in Bali again :)

Amelie

have you watched Amelie? if you haven't, I really recommend you do. the perfect love story to me..
I wonder, who's my Nino Quincampoix?

Stronger

Oftentimes we are so so much stronger than we thought we are.

Mom left on Sunday night. I prayed so hard that I wouldn't cry, and I didn't! At the airport, Mom was telling us all about her hilarious experiences during her holidays around the ASEAN countries and we were all laughing till our stomachs ached! It took our minds off her leaving, and it made things so much less painful saying goodbye.

My new room is nice and cosy, though I haven't finished unpacking. Still no internet, so this post is coming from my office! Haha! I've been trying to keep myself busy to take my mind off the silence of being alone, but last night my mom and brother rang, and hearing their voices made me so sad!


But I know I'll be ok.. :) And I look forward to saving up and travelling somewhere soon..I haven't decided where yet.

A secret little path..

There's this little secret road that I use at times on the way home..I discovered it one day while trying to bypass the heavy traffic, but ever since then, I use it not only on days when the traffic is bad, but also when I'm feeling sad. For some reason, the houses there reminded me a lot of Bali. They don't look anything like the houses in Bali actually, but the feeling that this little area gave me was of warmth and a 'village/kampung' kind of feeling. Considering it was just one road away from the highway, it was like discovering a hiding place from all the chaos outside.

Today the roads were horribly jammed up on the way back again. It took me 2 hours to reach home, but I'm not complaining. No more 2-hour drives to and from work beginning next week! :)
So I took my little secret route through my little secret village. And I saw the most beautiful picture as I was passing by which has made me fall even more in love with the place. I saw a young Chinese mother carrying her baby and chatting away happily with her Malay neighbour and her children in front of their house. At the same time, there was an old Malay lady with a walking stick, slowly walking down the street, held by an Indian friend of hers - you could see they've been friends a long time. I wished I could stop and give them all a hug for reminding me of how the races can get along better than just casual Hi's and Bye's.

It's ironic, but have you ever noticed how the higher-educated people tend to be more racist in this country? Try going outside the city and I'm sure you'll be surprised at how close the people are to each other, regardless of language or colour. I really think it's time be reminded of the simplicities in life. I know certain policies are not equal for the races, but it wasn't your next door neighbour who set the rules. They didn't do anything wrong by being born of a different race, so give them a chance and get to know them. I'm speaking to myself as much as anyone else reading this, because though I've never been a racist, it surprises me how little I know about the cultures of other races, because I've never really been encouraged to get to know them better.

So there, a little lesson that my secret little path down a less travelled road has taught me. :)

What money can't buy...

   

Money can't buy me a job that I love,
Money can't give me bosses who are patient and understanding,
Money can't buy me colleagues who are cooperative and willing to teach,
It can't buy me a loving family,
Or the laughter that we share.
It can't buy me health for my loved ones,
Money can't buy me the wonderful experience of meeting people from different backgrounds and realising that they are as much a creation of God as we are - perfect and loved by Him.

Oops I'm talking about work..

I try not to talk much about work once I get home but I'm really feeling so excited about my job at the moment!I've been learning more and more stuff, and I'm really getting a hang of it.

This week I was at one of our project construction sites for 3 days, and it was EXHAUSTING. We were there to check that all the fire protection systems are in place before the authorities come for the official testing. It was the first time I got to conduct this testing, and I was a little bit nervous at first - I didn't know how the contractors on site were going to react to a lady engineer. They could have just ignored and disrespected me, but they didn't! The first 2 days, I was there with my project manager, so there wasn't much of a problem. The true test came on the 3rd day when I had to go alone. I had to conduct the checks, but if the contractors treated me as a nobody, they wouldn't cooperate and do it properly. But it turned out that they were soooo respectful and they listened to me, and everything went so smoothly!

It's a funny situation when a younger person like me, especially a lady, has to give instructions to men who are so much older and who have so much more experience. But everything turned out amazing. The respect that they gave me makes me respect them even more.

Because the lifts weren't installed yet, we had to climb all the way up, and go back all the way down, a few times. By the end of it all, my legs muscles were really feeling like I had an intense workout at the gym!

On another note, I got my IELTS exam score on Friday, and I got 8.5 !! For those who don't know, this is an English exam, and I was really nervous about it when I sat for it. So I'm really pleased that that's over with now.. :)

I helped mom book her flight tickets last night. So it's all confirmed now..mom is flying to Melbourne on the 27th night, for good. I mean, she'll probably be back once a year or something..but yeah..she's moving to Melbourne. And I'll be moving to my dad's place. I'm not really looking forward to this drastic change in my life but I'm sure the Lord will be with me and give me comfort when I need Him most.

It's Chinese New Year this coming Thursday!!  I love CNY because it's just such a great time to get together with family members who you don't meet up with very often. I really wished my brother could come home to celebrate it with us but unfortunately his work doesn't allow it.

This past week there have been numerous enquiries as to my relationship status..I don't know if it's all the festivities coming up, and what with Valentine's Day around the corner, but everyone seems all hyped up about my being single! Haha. It's not that I'm intentionally trying to stay single, but so far everytime I felt like something might actually happen, it doesn't work out in the end. No matter how close it was. And it boggles my mind at times, but at the same time I'm happy that I didn't get into a relationship with anyone before really getting to know the person. In the past few months, I feel like I've learnt to enjoy just getting to know more and more people, and I'm not over-bothered with getting into a relationship just yet. It's only when someone actually asks me out that I get all flustered and don't know what to do. So maybe its a good thing that this doesn't happen very often. Hehe! Goodnight everyone.. :)

For there is a season for everything..

For there is a season for everything, 

That's what You told me. 

I often retract into my shell when I'm sad, 

Feeling more alone than ever, while wondering why I can't express myself.

And the more alone I feel, the more I feel as if You are sitting high up there watching me, 

Laughing at how silly I am. 

But then I remember, that You also promised me that You will never leave me. 

Through each and every hurdle, and every painful experience, 

You promised me. 

And I realise that You were never sitting high up there laughing at me, 

But You were heartbroken, wondering why I never shared my sorrow so You could cry together with me.